I'm watching all of Doctor Who, in order. And, lucky you, I'm sharing my experience.
Season One can be found here.
Season Two is here.
And now, appropriately enough, Season Three.
1. Galaxy Four
Doctor Who meets some robots, called Chumblies. You can just about see them here, but it's probably evident that I chose an image which gives more prominence to Vicky. Here she is wearing pigtails, which I like, and looking gormless, which is less attractive.
Here Vicky meets the Drahvins - the theoretically sexy lady villains of the story. Although this might be a composite shot, given the weird angle of her head. This is one of the stories that the BBC hurled into a skip, so all we have is people's reconstructions of it. I don't mind. I like pictures of Vicky.
The story basically entails the sexy lady aliens having a squabble with some gross triangular aliens called the Rill. Doctor Who and friends spend a lot of their time running between the two groups, as if mediating a playground dispute between teenage boys and girls.
It's quite possible that the Drahvins secretly fancy the Rills, but - being women - can't come out and say it, and are, instead, really mean to them.
I may be bringing some of my issues to the table here.
2. Mission to the Unknown
What's with this guy's face? It's awesome! If this was made now, he'd be in all the promotional material. And then he'd turn out to have a disappointingly small role where he does nothing. Which is what happens here.
There are Daleks in this story. One has a black helmet. This means he is best. Here we see him looking at a subordinate, hoping he will mention how fine his black helmet looks. The subordinate just goes on about the mission. Later, the black helmet Dalek will silently cry.
Here are some friends of the weird guy from the first picture. They're all having a big meeting about who has the best face. Or taking over the galaxy. I wasn't paying attention. Vicky is not in this one.
3. The Myth Makers
This one's about the Trojan Horse. There it is, looking brilliant. Lovely design work. This story is lots of fun. Again, it's been deliberately destroyed by the BBC, who live in constant fear that the Daily Mail will criticise them if they ever do anything good.
Kapow! Fight! This bit is very exciting. Who are they? I don't know. History guys. Doing history stuff. Actually, is this history, all this Greek stuff? Or is it just made up? I'm never sure. They say the film '300' really happened, which seems improbable. So I guess all bets are off.
Another picture of lovely Vicky, who leaves in this adventure to get married to some guy. Not this guy. She's not insane. He's saying "You have a woman's bottom!" Maybe.
4. The Daleks' Master Plan
This story goes on forever. In it, the Daleks have a plan, and spend ages going on about how great they are for thinking of it. Their plan is not that good, if I'm honest.
They get a big bomb thing, and plan to kill everyone with it. That's sort of a plan, I suppose, but I don't know why they make such a big deal of it.
All the weird looking guys from the meeting in 'Mission to the Unknown' get together to help. But then Doctor Who steals the bomb and runs off with it. This distresses the Daleks no end, and they do a lot of top shouting in response.
They then spend ages chasing Doctor Who and saying 'Please can we have our bomb back? We probably won't try to destroy the universe with it."
This is Mavic Chen. Seen here sitting as his space desk, doing space drawing. A Dalek has popped in to go on about their plan again. He is pretending he is listening, but he is really drawing. Daleks are fun to draw.
5. The Massacre
Another story that the BBC set fire to, laughing and shouting "We hate art!"
It seems like it was a pretty good one, too. Doctor Who goes missing for a bit, leaving new cool guy Steven to do all the work.
Steven is not as good as Ian was, but he's still pretty good. He's cross a lot of the time. Look at his face here. He's clearly thinking "Shut up, Doctor Who." and "How is he always drunk?" and "Why did Vicky have to leave? Her face was brilliant."
6. The Ark
In which... well... just look. I mean, what on earth is going on? It's like we've stumbled into some kind of debauched secret society. The guys in the black dress... things, with the shaggy hair and the one eye... I mean... what?
In this scene everyone is watching Doctor Who.
"Is Vicky in this one?"
"No."
"Boooo!"
Doctor Who has a new, rubbish, companion in this story. Dodo. There she is in the background. You can't hear it here, but her accent is truly awful. Doctor Who is hoping that if he antagonises the monster, then the monster will kill her.
Peter Purves, who plays Steven, is a fine actor. Imagine facing this and not just laughing and/or weeping.
7. The Celestial Toymaker
This story should be great. When I was a kid, and heard about it, I assumed it would be wonderful. It all takes place in a fantastical land of the imagination. And it has a great title. The Celestial Toymaker!
See Steven's face? That's what it's really like. It's like being sad, confused, angry and bored, all at the same time.
These guys are good, though. They have some fun banter and are a bit creepy. If the rest of the story had been like their bit, it would have been a good story.
The lady was in 'Allo 'Allo. She was Renee's wife. I think. She is probably more proud of that.
8. The Gunfighters
This feels like quite modern television, weirdly. It's a well told story, and beautifully made. You can imagine Matt Smith fitting into this quite nicely. And it would be more fun than the one where he is a cowboy - A Town Called Mercy. That's much less good.
I took this photo because I liked the framing. Nice use of a wheel. Maybe the best in all Doctor Who, until Kinda, in 1982.
9. The Savages
The BBC haven't got any of this story. They claimed that a big boy came in and took it and threw it in a skip. They are lying. It was them who threw it in a skip, because they are idiots.
This is a lovely shot of Doctor Who, doing a think. He's met a bunch of guys who pretend to be all reasonable and civilised, but are, in reality, total jerks. He's thinking, "I don't like the jerks."
This is Steven's last story. I've enjoyed him quite a lot. He's almost always furious, which seems like a much more realistic response to all this nonsense than Ian's unflappable air of elegant calm.
Here he's telling Dodo that he never liked her, that her hair is stupid and that she should find an accent and stick to it, and then maybe everyone wouldn't hate her.
10. The War Machines
Hurray! It's Polly. I don't love her as much as I loved Vicky, but she's lots of fun and has great hair. Ben is good too. There he is, peeking out from behind her.
Doctor Who picks these guys up in a club in London. He pretends that swinging clubs aren't his thing, but they absolutely definitely are.
The guy in the middle is awesome. He speaks like a man pretending to speak like a man from a BBC programme from the 1960s. He wears a bow tie that demands attention, whilst daring the observer to comment.
He's possessed by a super computer, which seems to excite him quite a lot. He's telling these guys that they should be possessed by a super computer too - it's ace.
This is a lovely shot of Polly. Great eye make up, and nice composition. Compare how actually sexy she is to the 'meant to be sexy' of the Drahvins in the season opener. What a difference a year makes.
That's the end of season 3. It's a long one! Coming soon - perhaps predictably - season 4!
Click here to read about Season 4
Go back to Season 2
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